Releasing Me: The Monday Project #1 (Re-Publish)

2009 was quite the year of transition for me. Throughout the course of the year one message became painfully clear... Life had become too busy and too complicated. In terms of my weight and overall health, I started the year making strides towards becoming medication free with hopes that I would be able to finally release the extra seventy pounds I am carrying around with me. The "medication free gig" went horribly wrong and it became apparent that I continue to need my medication, and while this was disappointing it was also freeing because I could no longer use the excuse "oh, I will drop the weight when I get off my meds". This initiated a barrage of diet attempts... Biggest Loser, Calorie counting, vegetarian... and the list goes on. The troubling issue for me was that I would drop an initial 5-7 pounds and then would stop while continuing to maintain the program. The only other outstanding physical issue that remained was the Mirena IUD I still had, so near the end of the year I finally removed that and took away any hormone issue that could be contributing, just in time for the holidays.

In a nutshell...

My biggest obstacles in 2009

Medication, Hormones, impatience, emotional eating and self-sabotage

My biggest pattern in 2009

Pick a plan, make it through about 6-8 weeks after plateauing at 5-7lb loss

Rock Bottom Moment

I think my rock-bottom moment was when my seven year old looked at me and told me I was fat and wanted to know why I was fat. We watch the Biggest Loser as a family and he had finally put two and two together and in his young, simple mind wanted an answer... Talk about convicting.

My bad habits

snack, snack, snack and sweets, sweets, sweets. Ever since I started my medication for PPD several years ago, my sweet tooth has grown out of control with chocolate being my drug of choice.

My potential hazards going into 2010

Emotional/stress eating is always my biggest hazard with snacking on sweets (mainly at work) coming in as a close second. I think I have thoughtfully and purposely weeded out many obstacles and because of my commitment to doing this in a healthy manner so as to change my way of living, not just a "follow a diet plan to drop the pounds" manner, I feel that I am well positioned for 2010.

What DID work in 2010

Boy have I learned a lot about myself... I have learned that I need to accept more love from those who care about me, so that I don't feel like I have to fill my "love tank" with food. I have identified the stress triggers that lead me to munch. I have learned that my body is an amazing mechanism that really is a work of art worthy of being respected and nurtured. I embraced my strength as a woman knowing that I am strong enough to accomplish my goals. I found the exercise that gives me an endorphin high and makes me happy every time I do it. I have begun to embrace my "sexy side" through zumba dance class and am not afraid to move my body and show it where I am and what I weigh in THIS moment.

So here I am... Its the beginning of 2010 and the future is BRIGHT!
THIS IS MY YEAR! I feel like 2009 was my time to workout a lot of kinks, learn a lot about myself and get my plan in place. My biggest plan for change in 2010 can be summed up in one word...

COMMITMENT.

Commitment to myself in terms of loving who I am and honoring my body because I love myself.

Commitment to a goal - Teams in Training - Rock and Roll San Diego - Actually signing-up and doing-it.

Commitment to conscious eating and doing what I know to be healthy and most importantly being conscious of how I am feeling when I eat.

Commitment to a team of support and accountability (Thank you Sisterhood!).

So... Here is the 2009 me....