Shrinkvivor Weigh-In #6

Let me just say, right here and now I want the SHRINKVIVOR title!

I have to say that my awesome tribe is STILL outfiting, outlosing and outlasting so far...  We are down to two!  We are a strong little team!

It has been quite the week... It started with my incredibly emotional journey in creating my Exposed post.  What a cathartic, cleansing and freeing experience it was!  I highly recommend it if you haven't done your own.  I have continued to adjust to my eating plan and am feeling great!  I have a ton of energy and can't believe how amazing food is tasting.  I made an incredible recipe that I saw on Biggest Loser last week.  If you didn't see the episode, Bob took some of the contestants to his house and cooked a completely vegan meal for them.  One of the recipes was Roasted Tri-Color Cauliflower and it was absolutely delish!   I am still having some sugar cravings, but feeling good and releasing this weight is worth it!

Our fitness challenge was MINUTES again.  I love this challenge.  Amazingly enough, my slower pace works to my benefit in this case!  My crazy long run on Saturday definitely helped my minute count.  It was brutal!  I hit my first wall at eight miles and then my BIG wall at ten miles, leaving me to leisurely walk the last two miles back to my car, with a very sore leg.  Needless to say I went almost straight to my lifesaving Sports Chiropractor friend and he set me up.  He adjusted the heck out of my back that was way out, lasered my leg and taped my knee and thigh with Spider tape.  Let me just say that Spider Tape is THE BOMB!  My leg felt better by evening and has been great since.  I had a phenomenal run yesterday!  Here is the miracle tape...

My total minutes rounded out at 458!!!  I am very happy with that number!

So... 19 days until my Half Marathon and in light of the disaster training run, my doctor has given me a plan to add complex carbs for one meal/day, several days before my last long training run and before the race.  We think that I just didn't have enough reserve given how low carb my eating plan is.  Stay tuned... Hopefully that will do the trick!  I am looking forward to shattering my time from my first Half!

Without further ado, it is time to share my stats!  Another great week!!!

Here are my stats:

Starting Weight

215 lbs
Starting Weight for this Challenge
197.6

Today's Weight

188.4 lbs

 188.4!?!?!  I can't remember the last time I saw the 180's - WOOOO HOOOO!

Change from last week

-3 lbs!!!!


Difference for the challenge
-9.2lb!!!!

Total Difference

 -26.6 lbs
Holy Crap!  I get to add this

to my sidebar!

 

Putting It All Out There - Exposed

I had never heard of The Exposed Movement until this week.

Everyone has been much a twitter about the one year anniversary of the beginning of this amazing movement.  It has given incredible individuals, like Roni & Mrs. Fatass the permission and freedom to "let it all hang out" and embrace the bodies they have been gifted with and that have supported and carried them through their life's journeys.

Some of my greatest mentors and friends from The Sisterhood have joined in and exposed themselves as well.  At first, I thought "oh, yeah, I can do this... especially if all of these women whom I respect so much are doing it too.  Then, as the day went on and I thought more and more about it, the reality of "putting it all out there" became much more real and I thought seriously about whether or not to go forward.  The conclusion I came to was that it was a logical next step in my amazing journey to accept, love and honor myself and the body that God gave me.

So, here I go...

I have had a love/hate relationship with my body for almost as far back as I can remember.  The first seven years of my life were carefree with little thought about my body other than the fact that I insisted on always wearing dresses (even in the 20 degree winter days of Colorado).  During second grade, my parents separated and my body became my battlefield and the recipient of much self-imposed abuse in the form of eating.  Rather than expressing my fear, sadness, sorrow and anger in their natural forms, I ate to numb the pain and to give myself the strength to be the caretaker and mother to my own mother who was crumbling before my eyes.  Fortunately, my parents reconciled and remain married to this day.  Unfortunately, damage was done and negative patterns emerged.

In the beginning, I just became the "chubby girl".  I went to fat camp, participated in sports and tried my best to live up to the skinny expectations that I knew my father had for me.  I decided in my mind that his love was conditional and depended on my being a certain weight - a weight that always seemed to be an enigma.  (We have done much work throughout my adulthood to repair much of this, and currently are closer than ever...).  I yo-yo'd up and down through high school and college.  I read books and I did counseling, but the pattern of eating my emotions still exists and I think will always be present in my life, but hopefully not in control of my life.

Ironically, my greatest challenge in learning to love my body has come in my marriage.  I always had the fairytale dreams of being completely vulnerable and comfortable before my husband and dreamed of being unabashedly open with my body.  Funny thing, once married, the REAL work began.  I married a man who love, love, loves every inch of my body and every fiber of my being - AMAZING, right?  Right... Well, it is amazing if you are willing to embrace and accept it.  I have officially spent ten years learning to do just that because nothing about it has come natural to me.  I am learning from him about unconditional love and appreciation for my body and my soul in EVERY SINGLE FORM they take and at every stage in life.  Another curious observation... I have come the farthest in acceptance of my body over the past couple of years - a period of time that I have weighed more than ever.

Going through and living to tell about my dark winter has given me new appreciation for the here and now.  Being dependent upon medication that has made it very difficult for me to release weight has forced me to come to an acceptance of what I look like HERE and NOW.  Being in touch with the fragility of life on a daily basis through my work, has caused me to stop wallowing in my own self-pity and self-loathing and appreciate who I am and what I have.

Finding the Sisterhood has pushed me to new levels in terms of what my body is capable of.  After finishing a half marathon at 200 pounds, my belief in myself and in the beauty of my body soared to new heights.  And so here I am, embracing my body and another funny thing... finding my way through releasing and letting go of the pounds.

This is the beautiful body, given to me by God and NOW it is the body that I am daily choosing to honor, respect and embrace...

This is the same bikini I bought and wore on my honeymoon (but was too embarrassed to share pictures of me wearing - at a weight that I would today be giddy to weigh!).  The same bikini that I will put on again when I reach my goal weight to see how far I have come.

This is the body that allows me to compete with athletes half my size, simply because I push it and ask it to do so.

This is the body that allows me to work on my feet every day, being at the bedside of families in their worst nightmare, lifting them up and carrying them through the journey.

This is the body that created, carried, gave birth to and nourished the two pieces of my heart named Sam and Noah.

This is the body that allows me to laugh until I snort and to cry and grieve with others in pain.

 This is the body that carried me 13.1 miles across the finish line of my first Half Marathon. 

This is the body that will allow me to complete 3 Half Marathon's in a year.


This is the body that continues to carry and support me even though I abuse it.

This is the body that allows me to dance for hours.

This is the body that hugs others and accepts love in return.

This is the body that God Gave me

and

THIS IS THE BODY I CHOOSE TO LOVE & EMBRACE

Shrinkvivor - Weigh-In #5

And the challenge rolls forward as we fight to win the SHRINKVIVOR title!

I have to say that my awesome tribe is STILL outfiting, outlosing and outlasting so far...  We are down to three and I was sure that we were going to be sent to Exile Island last week!  BUT, here we are, small and mighty!

I have returned to a normal routine in terms of being back to work and the "normal" work schedule.  However, there has been little normal about this past week.  I officially started my new medically supervised eating program last Thursday and am in a "detox mode" if you will.  I have completely gone off sugar (except limited fruit) and yesterday was the roughest day yet, which tells me that I should be close to relief...  I am very excited to see how all goes.

Our fitness challenge was MILES again.  I loved this challenge the first time and although I was derailed from my total goal of 26 miles due to an unplanned trip to the Emergency Room with my son and ended up with 22 miles!  I am so proud of all that I am pushing myself to do.  I would have never fathomed logging 22 miles in one week, this time last year.

One monumentally HUGE little highlight to the week was getting to meet Ali Vincent winner of the Biggest Loser.  My awe and excitement must have shown on my face, because before I could get any words out of my mouth, she grabbed me and gave me a hug.  It was really amazing to get to tell her what an inspiration she has been to me and how much her journey motivates me!  And let me tell you, it doesn't look like she has gained a pound of her weight back... She looks phenomenal!  She is one of the spokeswomen for an organization that sponsors the "Kids Rock" running program that my kids are participating in and we were at the season kick-off party for that.  She taught my little guy how to hula-hoop!

As I mentioned above, I started my new eating plan.  I am drinking more than 80oz of water everyday, eating tons of vegetables and two servings of fruit daily and I have tracked my food daily!  I have absolutely loved to see what this challenge has brought out of me!  And today's weigh-in is no exception!!!

Here are my stats:

Starting Weight

215 lbs
Starting Weight for this Challenge
197.6

Today's Weight

191.4 lbs

Change from last week

-2.6 lbs!!!!


Difference for the challenge
-6.2lb!!!!

Total Difference

 -23.6 lbs
WOWEEE!!!! ZOWEEEE!!! That felt good to type those numbers!

 

Sister Reunion

I shared a lot about our recent trip to Texas, here... One of the sweetest rewards for traveling to Texas was getting to see my SAH Hookers friends, Christy and Lisa.  We ran our first half marathon together on Team Shrinking Jeans in June and all three of us are training for our next races in November.  All of us bonded as we trained together as a team, and we all have loved sharing the amazing bond of accomplishing something that few people in this world ever undertake. One of the greatest things has been that we have all continued to grow in friendship, sisterhood and as like-minded women striving to live our best lives.

I have said it before and I will take a moment to say it again... I cannot imagine my life without The Sisterhood.  I am absolutely thrilled that I stumbled upon it a year ago and even more thrilled that I jumped in and joined Team Shrinking Jeans really not knowing anyone.  The friendships, humor, encouragement, fun and most importantly the common willingness to challenge one another have literally changed my life and have helped me to invest more in my health and overall well being.  These ladies have become so important to me and have become truly like sisters over the past year.  I relish in their triumphs and they encourage me in mine.  When I found myself right back in my Dark Winter a couple of months ago, the first friends I went to were these ladies.  I had responses from every one of them within less than 24 hours.  THAT is friendship and THAT is sisterhood.  And THAT makes me incredibly grateful!

So, you can imagine my excitement to be able to see two of these ladies while in Texas.  Christy, happens to live relatively close to my MIL where we were staying.  Of course "close" is a relative term, as Christy lives in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the beautiful hill country where many towns are at least 30 minutes apart.  So, we met in Kerrville, a town 30 minutes from where I was staying for a run.  Little did I know just how BIG those hills in the "HILL COUNTRY" would be... We found a track and then parked about 2 miles from it and ran (downhill) walked (uphill) to the track and then did three miles on the track.  Christy was such a good sport with me.  I was not only unaccustomed to hills, but I was still sweating out all of the adult beverages I had ingested at all of the wedding festivities over the weekend, so I walked A LOT!!!  We had such a great time chatting it up and catching up... It was awesome!  After our run, we headed to Starbucks for a well deserved latte and breakfast.  What a great morning!  I left on more than just an exercise high, but on a "I've just spent time with a dear friend" high.

 

Thanks for introducing me to your HILLS, Christy!  And thank you for your friendship and for taking a step of faith and starting that little website we all love!

If that wasn't enough, we took a little side trip to Austin to see one of David's best friends and to see Lisa, one of my other "sisters"!  Lisa and I were "race buddies" at the Half.  She was nursing an injury, which brought her closer to my pace, so we started together and were together for the first several miles and ended up finishing within a few minutes of each other.  

So, when we got into town and spent some time with David's friend and got the kids to bed, I headed over to Lisa's and we sat on her patio talking, laughing and enjoying a great glass of wine.  She is one funny lady!  It was fun to share the stories of meeting our spouses and stories of those who came before.  SHE has some stories!  Then, we got our families together at one of the most beautiful places in Austin... Oasis.  What a great choice!  We had the perfect little enclosed section of the patio to keep five kids contained and still have an amazing view of the sunset.  Her kiddos are so fun.  Her Sam talked my ear off and my absolute favorite was how he said my name... He was sooo excited to tell me everything and in trying to say my difficult name, it came out Miss Tumbowee (or as I called it Miss Tumbleweed) and then when I asked him if "Miss Tiff" would be easier, he said "yeah, Miss Tuff".  How cute is that!!!  I am so thrilled that we got some "girl time" the night before, but is was fun to hang out together as moms with our kiddos too.  Here are some pics from dinner...

Running Buddies - Reunited!

 Kiddos - passing time while the adults ate...

 Incredible Lake Travis Sunset!

 The "crazy picture" - a bribe for taking a nice pic first!

 A rare opportunity for a pic of Lisa and her kiddos!

Thanks, Lisa, for being so amazing and so authentic!  You are doing an awesome job raising your kiddos and taking care of yourself too!  You inspire me.

So, there you have it!  Love, love, loved seeing two of my SAHs!!!

Shrinkvivor - Weigh-In #4

It has been another exciting week in the land of SHRINKVIVOR!

I have to say that my awesome tribe is STILL outfiting, outlosing and outlasting so far...

This was a crazy week for me full of travel, eating out, attending a wedding and seeing great friends!  I am more than thrilled that I was able to maintain, given the travel.

Our fitness challenge was FASTEST MILE.  Could be any one mile during the week...  I blew myself away with an 11:23 minute mile!!!  I thought I was going to drop by the time I finished!  That feeling was followed by total exhilaration! 

In other exercise news... I had the exciting opportunity to see one of my Team Shrinking Jeans SAH's while I was in Texas.  Christy and I got together for a run/walk through the hills of Kerrville with a nice interlude on the High School Track.  It was like having coffee with an old friend (which we did after our run!), and was so good for my soul.  This whole fitness journey has been so amazing for me and there are just many people in my life that don't totally understand it.  Especially the online component.  That's okay, it is a bit different, but I cannot imagine my life without The Sisterhood and without my amazing Team Shrinking Jeans SAH's.  You have ALL been inspiring, supportive, funny, committed and unafraid to throw down challenges!  My life wouldn't be nearly as rich without all of you!

Here's our post-run, post-coffee pic!

On the eating front, I did pretty well all things considered.  I had plenty to confess on Tuesday, given that the alcohol was flowing at the rehearsal dinner and the wedding, the food was amazing and there was a ton of eating out.  I did two things that helped me maintain my weight.  First, I drank my water - minimum of 2-3 liters of water EVERY DAY!  I also kept up with my exercise, walking on one day, running on two days and plenty of running around with the kids.  I will start my medically supervised plan tomorrow, so I am very optimistic that I will be starting to make bigger and more consistent progress.  Our other challenge was to eat our fruits and veggies... I am proud to say that I never have a problem with this - I love my fruits and veggies!  I did great and didn't skimp just because I was on vacation!

I will be posting more about my trip and more about my time with Christy and Lisa soon.  It was a blast to see both of them!

Anyway, I should probably get to the details... The bottom line.

Here are my stats:

Starting Weight

215 lbs
Starting Weight for this Challenge
197.6

Today's Weight

194 lbs
This was a bit annoying - I didn't have access to a digital scale, so I was left with an even number.  I will take it and am thrilled to have maintained!

Change from last week

-0.2lb 


Difference for the challenge
-3.6lb

Total Difference

 -21 lbs

 

Shrinkvivor Weigh-In #3

It has been another exciting week in the land of SHRINKVIVOR!

I have to say that my awesome tribe is outfiting, outlosing and outlasting so far...

We will see what this week brings!

Our fitness challenge was MINUTES.  Minutes, minutes, minutes of exercise.  Could be any activity.  I am at a grand total of 379 minutes!  My slower running pace was to my advantage this week!  I had a great NINE mile run/walk on Saturday and am starting to feel like I am hitting a groove in terms of pacing.  We competitive people have some difficulty in the area of pacing - I am learning that it benefits me to be more like "the tortoise" even though every fiber of my being wants to be "the hare" 

On the eating front, I did pretty well.  I made a HUGE decision to start a medically supervised weight loss plan and will start next Thursday when I get back from vacation.  One of their specialties is medication induced weight gain.  I am very excited and cautiously excited.  Most importantly, I feel like I am making a good decision.  I have been given a copy of the eating plan and have begun to implement the changes.  First and foremost really cutting back on carbs and sugar.  I have continued to drink my 60-100 ounces of water and haven't been through a drive-thru (EVEN Starbucks!) in over two weeks!

Speaking of VACATION... Did I mention that I am going to see TWO of our FAVORITE sisters from the Hood while on vacation this next week?!?!  I will be seeing the amazing Christy M - hopefully for a 10 mile run in the beautiful Texas Hill Country.  Then, a few days later we will head to Austin where I will get to see the lovely Lisa M!  We all had so much fun together on Team Shrinking Jeans and I have been in some serious SAH withdrawals since being in San Diego.  The bigger reason we are off to Texas is to attend the wedding of my husband's youngest brother.  The greatest part is that my husband is performing the ceremony (he's a pastor) - an opportunity that most pastors do not get.

Anyway, I should probably get to the details... The bottom line.

Here are my stats:

Starting Weight

215 lbs
Starting Weight for this Challenge
197.6

Today's Weight

194.2lbs
I have a picture but my computer is NOT cooperating this morning!

 (Gotta love this "picture of the scale" thing...)

Change from last week

-1.8lb 


Difference for the challenge
-3.4lb

Total Difference

 -20.8 lbs

 

Shrinkvivor weigh-in #2

What a week this has been!  I am so excited about SHRINKVIVOR!

I am so lucky to be part of an awesome tribe...

We are rocking already!

  
Moxie Maroon Mavens,

How is that for a name!  These are some super gals, who are motivating me and challenging me daily.  I am so proud of our tribe!

This was a pretty darn amazing week... I accomplished a HUGE milestone and broke through YET ANOTHER WALL!  I LOVE a challenge and when I found out that the fitness challenge was a miles challenge, I was excited!  Then, I had to step back and realize JUST how much my life had already changed... I, Tiffany Zook, was excited about a MILES challenge?!?!  What on earth was that?!?! I have come so far... I set out to knock it out of the park and I did!  My total miles between Thursday morning and last night:

24  TWENTY FOUR!!!

On the eating front, I did pretty well.  I have really watched my portions and water, oh the water... I have been drinking enough water to propel me across the ocean afloat.  100 + ounces every day to be exact!  I have also been watching my sugar intake.  Those things combined with the exercise have made for a successful week.

I am looking into some medically supervised eating plans, doing research and weighing the benefits of going that route given the fact that much of my weight gain and difficulty losing is medication related.  Until having medication related weight gain, I never had any difficulty losing weight when I wanted.  I dropped 40 pounds after my first son in less than six months without much struggle and was still able to "indulge" here and there without much impact.  I am currently at FOUR years of carrying 60 extra pounds from the weight I was at after my first son, 50 of which packed on within several months of going on medication for post-partum anxiety/depression.  I have tried WW, calorie counting, South Beach, Blood Type Diet with an average of 1-3 pound loss in the first month to six weeks.  The only positive has been that I seem to have mastered maintaining my weight give or take 5 pounds... Just not the optimal weight. I finally found success using an appetite/craving control supplement with following a low carb/low calorie (1200/day) eating plan combined with training for my first half marathon and dropped 19 pounds over the course of six months.  This was great, but slow, slow.  I know the saying... slow and steady wins the race... Yeah, yeah, yeah.  I also know how this 197 pound body feels running.  It feels like I am carrying another person with me.  I have been making incredible strides with my speed and breathing, being able to run at and 11-12 minute/mile pace... as long as I continue on with my walk intervals.  I am mentally ready to drop the walk intervals... My body just isn't seeming able to maintain the pace.  It is a lot to ask of my frame carrying this much extra.

Anyway, all that ramble to say that I am looking at a medically supervised program that incorporates a similar medication to the supplement I was taking before.  This program has been very successful for others with medication related weight gain.  Part of the program is a year of maintenance to assist/ensure that patients are supported to implement lasting/effective habits.  I have a few more questions to be answered before making a final decision, so stay tuned...

Here are my stats:

Starting Weight

215 lbs
Starting Weight for this Challenge
197.6

Today's Weight

196lbs

 (I can't believe I actually took a picture...)

Change from last week

-1.6lb 
(feel like it should have been more, given the exercise...)
Difference for the challenge
-1.6lb

Total Difference

 -19 lbs